Tuesday, September 1, 2009

That's What Friends are for...

Do you remember the 1986 hit, "That's What Friends Are For?" The song was originally recorded by Rod Stewart in 1982 and later covered by Dionne Warwick and Friends in 1985. In January 1986, it was #1 for 4 weeks on Billboard's Top 100.

The chorus says:
"Keep smiling, keep shining
Knowing you can always count on me, for sure
That's what friends are for
For good times and bad times
I'll be on your side forever more
That's what friends are for"

I mention the song mostly because of an incident from yesterday that I will elaborate on in a minute, but I also mention the song because of its lyric.

Friends are for counting on in the good and bad times. That is what friend's are for. Of course, we do fail as friends, but ultimately, we choose our friends based on his or her ability to love us for who we are.

Sometimes these friends are our spouses, our school mates, our parents or even our children. Sometimes these friends are all of the above.

I don't parent in the style of a "best buds" mentality, but I am flattered that any of my children would consider me a friend because, ultimately, when it's age appropriate, I want to be less a parent and more a friend. Anyway, I digress...

The point here really is my story from yesterday.

Eliza was sitting at the kitchen bar working on her homework. She had become very frustrated and teary-eyed over her math problems. Cara was also in the kitchen and observed the whole incident.

I offered to help Eliza, and she accepted. Her main problem was not having enough room to "show her work" on her worksheet. My suggestion was to use a separate sheet of paper to show her work and turn that in with her worksheet.

She really did need the extra paper to see what she was doing as it involved subtraction, borrowing and carrying on 4 digit numbers top and bottom. Each number in the figure required a borrow and a carry... lots of work.

My extra paper suggestion seemed to help at first, but then she fell apart afraid that it would not be acceptable to her teacher which is not true. However, it was true enough for Eliza that she could no longer accept my help, and I could no longer give it.

We were both totally frustrated, and she was in tears.

Cara, in her wonderful mother/sister voice, chimed in and asked Eliza if she would like her to help. Eliza said yes.

Cara explained that when she was in 3rd grade, math was hard for her to grasp at first. She explained that doing your work on a separate sheet of paper helped a lot (sounds familiar).

Then... she suggested that Eliza STAPLE her work to her worksheet. Well, that was the glue that sealed the deal... stapling was the key to success!

Eliza's eyes dried. She sat up straight and listened to Cara explain how to neatly write her problems on the page, do the figuring, and then transfer the answers to her worksheet.

Cara saved the day for me and for Eliza.

Eliza finished and left the kitchen. I turned to Cara and said, "Thank you so much, honey. You were a huge help. You were able to explain what I couldn't in a way that Eliza totally got. Thank you!"

Cara put her arms around my waist, looked up at me with her big blue eyes and said, "That's what friends are for!"

Yes, indeed. That is what friends are for...


Dolores said...

Once again - Thanks for sharing. I love it when I get that email that says you have a new Blog.
The latest is such a visual, for which you have such a knack. Cara has SUCH a tender heart towards everyone. I can just see Eliza's relief at Cara's suggestion. I so hope she gets a good grade. If for no other reason than innovation. Keep em coming. Dee

Boothe said...

unbelievable. and to think i probably barely missed that with my unexpected visit yesterday. those girls of yours are too awesome. i only hope mine will follow in their footsteps.

RoseAnne Coleman said...

Way ta go, Gurl Frin"! Writing down the bones of your life...Not only am I proud of you, I give your writing the highest marks...Thanks for taking the time to do the right thing of recording the evidence of God in your moments, in your children's moments.

Note to self:All personal items are housed in a space with a door--doggy proofed! love to you, RoseAnne